Today

Today I have an overwhelming sense of ickiness. I feel like I'm not doing enough: not meeting enough people, not taking the right care of myself, not making enough progress at work, not being creative, not giving back. I'm struggling to spend time with all the people that I want to see, excel at my budding little career and all meetings all the other tremendous goals we set for ourselves. 

I guess what I'm struggling with today is a lack of balance. I'd really like to fit in a weekly yoga class, but where? I'd like to be sure I'm moving in the right direction, but how? I'd like to be involved in a theatre, be invested in a professional organization. Be on the move. I'd like to cook more, or spend more time on this blog, or think about what I want to be doing in 5 years, but honestly, sometimes when I get home from work I want to be done. 

And, I feel like I am on the move. All the time. Certainly, I'm not the only person struggling with this. I know that. But today, it's consumed my day. 

Frustratingly, it seems like everyone else has their shit together. And I know, really, that's not true--they probably want to swing by a yoga class too, or make a line of stationary. But I surround myself with these fantastic, well-connected, on-the-go people who seem to do it all. And I feel not good enough.

How will I make everything fit? Or, more importantly, fit the way I want it to?

Send hugs. sorry for the rant.